Sideline Chatter: Maybe it’s due to all of the pine tar on the bats



You certain the umps are checking pitchers’ fingers for sticky stuff?

Because two batted balls defied the legal guidelines of physics and didn’t bounce final week:

• A ball hit by the Columbus Clippers’ Ernie Clement went straight down and caught within the filth a foot in entrance of residence plate.

• And a line drive by the Buffalo Bisons’ Gabriel Moreno punctured the padding of the left-field wall and caught there.

Headlines

• At Fark.com: “Ole Miss found their punter at a frat party. No word on if that guy was kicking the keg to win that roster spot.”

• At TheOnion.com: “Man feeling ancient after realizing he’s older than everyone in Little League World Series.”

Staying residence

The Trail Blazers won’t ship their TV or radio broadcasters on street journeys, as a substitute having them announce video games from residence.

There you’ve gotten it — the NBA season’s first non-traveling name.

Madden, Madden world

Cardinals tight finish Zach Ertz named his new child son Madden — born eight days earlier than the most recent model of the favored online game was launched.

No fact to the rumor his center identify is “23.”

Need an intervention?

If you’re complaining about your staff’s first-week displaying in a preseason fantasy soccer league … you might need a playing drawback.

He’ll get time now

A thief stole the $70,000 watch of FC Barcelona’s Robert Lewandowski however was apprehended a brief distance away.

As for the perp, there goes his clear rap sheet.

New school strive

With NIL offers in place, shouldn’t the NCAA substitute the time period “student-athlete” with “athlete-entrepreneur?”

Who’s your caddie?

One of the U.S. Amateur‘s threesome featured Mark Costanza, Hazen Newman and Campbell Kremer.

Only thing better would be Jerry Seinfeld on their bags.

Peaking early

The Ravens ran their preseason win streak to 21 with a 23-10 win over the Titans.

Can’t look ahead to the staff to accounce its “Mr. August” award.

Phone tagged

Rodolfo Castro has been fined and suspended for one recreation for enjoying with a cellphone in his again pocket.

Baseball traditionalists applauded it, whereas proponents cried “bad call!”

Talking the discuss

• Tim Hunter of Everett’s KRKO Radio, on 1000’s of circumstances of Wild Cherry Capri Sun being voluntarily recalled: “Question: If there are no Capri Suns, do we have to cancel soccer season?”

• Comedy author Paul Lander, after Nebraska soccer coach Scott Frost claimed his offensive lineman vomit 15-20 occasions per follow: “No word how often the QB hurls.”

• Sam Farmer of the L.A. Times, by way of Twitter, on the importance of Aug. 16: “Elvis, Aretha and Babe Ruth died on this day. A king, a queen and a sultan.”

Legging it out

If Seahawks punter Michael Dickson, who has punted 15 occasions for a 47.5-yard common within the first two preseason video games, retains up that tempo for the common season, he’d kick footballs a complete of 6,060 yards.

Or 3.4 miles.

Quote marks

• David Whitley of the Gainesville (Fla.) Sun, on the Pirates’ Rodolfo Castro having his cellphone fly out of his again pocket whereas sliding into third: “It was the most embarrassing MLB moment since a 24-ounce vial of Dianabol and six syringes fell out Barry Bonds’ pocket as he beat out an infield single in 2002.”

• Mike Bianchi of the Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel, on Florida’s new $85-million, 140,000-square-foot soccer facility: “I’m not saying (it) is plush and palatial, but LIV Golf just offered the Gators $200 million to buy it.”

• Janice Hough of LeftCoastSportsBabe.com, after 38-year-old Packers QB Aaron Rodgers ripped the staff’s younger receivers for dropped passes and dangerous route-running: “How long until he screams at them to get off his lawn?”

• Dave Fabrizi, by way of Facebook, on MLB’s playoff schedule ending with a potential Game 7 of the World Series on Nov. 5: “If they happen to have a rainout, the game might be shown at halftime of the Bills-Jets game on Nov. 6. I can hardly wait.”

Letting Steve prepare dinner

Spurrier’s Gridiron Grille, ex-Florida soccer coach Steve Spurrier’s year-old restaurant in Gainesville, is already ranked because the fifth-busiest within the state.

With 311,696 dinners served, 128,962 cocktails bought, 38,644 bottles of wine uncorked and 57,788 beers poured, passing the foods and drinks isn’t an issue.

Quote, finish quote

• Curtis Rogers of ROOT Sports, by way of Twitter, after the Angels’ Keystone Kops defensive efficiency within the ninth inning towards the Mariners: “Haven’t seen a breakdown in Anaheim like that since nearly everyday on Space Mountain.”

• Red Sox broadcaster Dennis Eckersley, on the Pirates’ low-budget roster: “You talk about a no-name lineup … This is a hodgepodge of nothingness.”

• RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com, on Gisele Bündchen, spouse of Bucs QB Tom Brady, gracing the entrance of British Vogue: “Even Brady can’t beat that coverage.”

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